![[discussion of body image, breast shape, sexuality]
i don’t think this is a clear-cut issue, myself, but only because of socialization. in environments where nudity is normalized, seeing people’s ‘private parts’ isn’t particularly sexual; i spent many a summer at a camp with outdoor, communal showers, and while i’m not unattracted to other women by any means, in that context breasts and genitals were no more titillating than thighs or forearms or collarbones.
that said, shame isn’t so easily dismissed. i spent my adolescence hating my thighs, which were softer and thicker than i thought they should be, and as a result swimming—which i used to love—became reliably torturous, because bathing suits made exposure unavoidable. my body changed, eventually, but the shape of my breasts didn’t: they’re what one website terms ‘swooping breasts,’ small and widely set, with large areolas and prominent montgomery’s tubercles. i’ve gotten to the point, now, where there are things i like about them—and that others like!—but i wouldn’t say i’m confident displaying them to partners, or going braless even though as an A-cup that would otherwise be thoroughly feasible; it’s hard not to compare my breasts to others i’ve seen, and find mine wanting.
we’re straying a bit from the topic, though, because that sort of shame has more to do with what one’s comfortable sharing than with what one’s comfortable seeing: someone might well be too embarrassed to bare her breasts in public, but wholly unbothered by others baring theirs. the group we’re concerned with here, by contrast, will be bothered by any baring of breasts, as though they’re seeing something taboo.
and that’s tricky, because it’s not a feeling i want to invalidate! putting people into sexual situations without their consent is a nasty, violating sort of move. but on the other hand, why are breasts automatically sexual? it would be utterly absurd, for instance, to argue that witnessing a woman breastfeed her child entails some sort of sexual involvement; nourishing a child is an act of familial, platonic caring, not one that’s romantic or sexual. other body parts are variably coded—take hands, for instance, which sometimes do nothing; sometimes type or cook or build; and sometimes turn others on, through either visual or tactile stimulus. why can’t we view breasts the same way?
ultimately, discomfort is only ameliorated by experience—and how to make breast-neutralizing experiences, so to speak, available without forcing them on the unsuspecting, is a complicated, potentially insoluble proposition. but one, i think, entirely worth pondering.](http://30.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lnu57gZQd71qg62kho1_500.jpg)
[discussion of body image, breast shape, sexuality]
i don’t think this is a clear-cut issue, myself, but only because of socialization. in environments where nudity is normalized, seeing people’s ‘private parts’ isn’t particularly sexual; i spent many a summer at a camp with outdoor, communal showers, and while i’m not unattracted to other women by any means, in that context breasts and genitals were no more titillating than thighs or forearms or collarbones.
that said, shame isn’t so easily dismissed. i spent my adolescence hating my thighs, which were softer and thicker than i thought they should be, and as a result swimming—which i used to love—became reliably torturous, because bathing suits made exposure unavoidable. my body changed, eventually, but the shape of my breasts didn’t: they’re what one website terms ‘swooping breasts,’ small and widely set, with large areolas and prominent montgomery’s tubercles. i’ve gotten to the point, now, where there are things i like about them—and that others like!—but i wouldn’t say i’m confident displaying them to partners, or going braless even though as an A-cup that would otherwise be thoroughly feasible; it’s hard not to compare my breasts to others i’ve seen, and find mine wanting.
we’re straying a bit from the topic, though, because that sort of shame has more to do with what one’s comfortable sharing than with what one’s comfortable seeing: someone might well be too embarrassed to bare her breasts in public, but wholly unbothered by others baring theirs. the group we’re concerned with here, by contrast, will be bothered by any baring of breasts, as though they’re seeing something taboo.
and that’s tricky, because it’s not a feeling i want to invalidate! putting people into sexual situations without their consent is a nasty, violating sort of move. but on the other hand, why are breasts automatically sexual? it would be utterly absurd, for instance, to argue that witnessing a woman breastfeed her child entails some sort of sexual involvement; nourishing a child is an act of familial, platonic caring, not one that’s romantic or sexual. other body parts are variably coded—take hands, for instance, which sometimes do nothing; sometimes type or cook or build; and sometimes turn others on, through either visual or tactile stimulus. why can’t we view breasts the same way?ultimately, discomfort is only ameliorated by experience—and how to make breast-neutralizing experiences, so to speak, available without forcing them on the unsuspecting, is a complicated, potentially insoluble proposition. but one, i think, entirely worth pondering.
(via coolcrayons)
1 month ago • 31,924 notes
